Thursday, March 24, 2011

A Girl and A Date

Yes, we do!  We have a date for my c-section, but before I tell you about that, I want to share something that happened at one of our doctor's appointments yesterday.

Most anyone reading this blog knows about our past struggle with infertility.  We tried to have a baby for four years and in that time went through two miscarriages, some setbacks, lots of tests, more tests and more tests, and many treatments.

We ended up doing IVF this summer and we were blessed to get pregnant the first time with our precious twins.

Fast forward to yesterday in the doctor's office.  We are on the couch waiting to be called back; I am playing Angry Birds on McH's phone and he is reading a magazine, probably Golf or American Quarter Horse because he's multicultural like that.  Or multidimensional.  Multi-something.

In walks a girl probably in her mid-twenties, obviously coming from work.  But what I notice first is her attitude.  Someone opened the door for her to walk in and she didn't even acknowledge them.  I tend to notice that kind of stuff.  Maybe that makes me a snob, so be it. 

Of course, the (sadly) judgemental part of my mind starts reeling..."wow, how rude is she...look at her face...c'mon, smile a is not that bad...etc..."  She was on the phone with her mother, and every other second was an eye roll, a curt comment, a brief answer.  I felt sorry for her mother who was obviously asking her things like, "what are you doing tonight?  What are you going to do for dinner?..." Things a mother asks.

She was even short with the receptionist.  

And here I was, HUGE pregnant staring her right in the face, wondering only one thing: what crawled in her hiney and died?  How embarrassing to admit that!  Another pregnant woman sat behind this "mad-at-the-world" girl and chatted away on her cell about an upcoming baby shower.

After a few minutes, I went back to my game.

The receptionist called her up to the window and asked her a question I couldn't make out.

But then, she pulled a little box out of her pocket and said, "I'm just here for the nurse to give me this...she's usually the one who does it."

It was a bottle of progesterone.

And it hit me.

And my heart felt like it might just break in a million pieces right there.

She was one of "us".  

An infertile.

She was struggling.

She needed prayers, not judgement.

She is bitter.

She is fed up.

She's tired.

And there I sat, big pregnant belly, only feet from her, seemingly without a care in the world.

She had no idea we are sisters.

Part of the worst kind of sorority.

Kindred spirits, but not of our own choosing.

I wanted so badly to go hug her, to put my arms around her and tell her it would be okay and tell her our whole story.

I wanted her to look me in the eyes and to be able to know that I didn't get to this place easily like so many others.  I struggled, too.  I felt that bitterness, the jealousy (at times), the hopelessness, the helplessness.

I wanted to yell at her, "I'm an infertile, too!  I get you!"  

We were called back shortly after that and while we were in the room waiting for our doctor, I asked McH if he noticed the girl.  He wasn't sure until I started describing her.

I said, "Did you see her eyes?  She is so bitter.  I recognized those eyes, babe."

And that was that.  I've thought a lot about her since yesterday afternoon.

I pray she finds peace and hope even when things seem so far from those two ideals.

But it also makes me so very thankful and grateful to God for bringing me through this struggle and this journey.  There are few things I enjoy more than talking to and hopefully helping those who are in the middle of what we are now on the other side of...that deep pit of infertility.  

Above all, God is good...even when we don't understand His ways.

We are living proof of just that and of God's promises and that His word is TRUE and ALIVE!  During our infertility journey, I clung to the promise of Jeremiah 29:11: "for I know the plans I have for you..."  Boy, did He!  And they are more than anything we could have ever dreamed of!  


Speaking of miracles and promises...yesterday our c-section date was set:  Reese Kathleen and Truett Zeldon will make their debut (unless He has other plans) Monday, April 18th!!!

Also, they are BOTH weighing in at a whopping 5 lbs. 3 oz!!!  Yep, little Miss has caught up to her brother!  Way to go, Reesey!!

I am having some canvases painted to put above their cribs.  My mom's best friend, and our long-time family friend, Donna P. is painting them and McH and I decided we would each choose a verse to give her to use on one of the canvases.  I had been searching for a long time and was able to give her mine pretty quickly (Psalm 37:4...Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart).  But McH has really been contemplating and trying to choose what he thought would be the best and what he thought God was leading him to.  Last night on the way home, he told me he decided on the following verse; he kept going back to it over and over again so he felt confident this was the right one.  I think it is perfect!

Psalm 139: 13-14 (New King James version)

For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb; I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.

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  1. I'm sure it is surreal to have a date and a time for motherhood! I am so excited for you both!

  2. Beautifully written. I've also felt the urge to hug the bitter away.

    Looking forward to the 18th!

  3. Great post! And I love Psalm 134!

  4. Everyone has a's funny how we get caught up in our own lives not to notice others.

    Yeah for April 18th!! What a wonderful day it will be. And love the verses y'all have chosen. Absolutely perfect.

  5. Love this post, girl!!

    Yay for a 'due date'!!
    And yay for the wonderful verses you guys chose, beautiful!!!

  6. What a beautiful post! So amazing the lives growing inside of you! Beautiful miracles!

  7. Wow...what a post. I pray for that girl to have peace, that only comes from our Lord. You were a blessing to her and she didn't even know it...yet.
    Beautiful verse..So happy for you and your "date" ;)

  8. Wonderful are right....everyone has some sort of struggle that they are dealing with...I try to always remember that and just be nice to people. :)

    Love the verse...perfect.

    Hop on over for a visit.....join in the fun of Farm Photo Friday at my blog where you add any photos that you have taken on the farm, ranch, in your garden or just out in the country!! Would love to have you play along. :)


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